Sex.

First I would like to say Dear Dr. A, I’m sorry if this isn’t technically appropriate, if you think I need to I will take it down later.

Sex. That’s right. Sex. How is sex related to politics? It’s not, really. This is more on feminism. Just to warn you, I’m probably going to start another category dedicated to feminism. Because there’s a lot to say on the subject. But anyways, back to sex.

Sex is considered some sort of strange status, opinions on the matter differ from person to person. For example, in my sophomore year I was talking with a friend and somehow it came up that at that time, I hadn’t had sex. Her response? ‘Wow, that’s awesome, I’m proud of you.’ Which was, truly not the response I was looking for considering that just a few days previous we had been talking about how she basically wanted to get pregnant, and was surprised that she already hadn’t.

Depending on age and gender and quite a few other factors, everyone has a different response to finding out whether or not you are a virgin. From getting called a prude to a slut or a whore, the reaction never seems to be very fair, towards men as well, but mainly women.

My opinion? Why the hell does it matter?? What’s the difference to you? What I do and whom I do it with has no effect on your life whatsoever, so why does everyone feel as though it’s their right to comment on it? It’s ridiculous!

The idea of purity is pretty much long gone in today’s society, you know, the whole staying a virgin until marriage type thing (which, by the way, when done in today’s society has had a few terrible effects on people, check it out here)

And yet there is no time that everyone agrees is alright. Nobody really cares, if you were, or matter of fact are, happy with your sex life or lack there of.

Especially for women. There is no way for a woman to win in today’s society. It is unfair for men as well, considering that they tend to be not considered men until they have sex, but at least after that point they stop getting crap for it. Women get crap for their sex lives from their teenage years to retirement. How is that okay? For example, there’s this tweet from the meninist account saying that there are two reasons for being single. Either you suck too much dick or you don’t suck enough. Tell me, how much dick sucking is enough?

The point is, both women and men are unfairly and pointlessly judged over their own private and personal life decisions and this aspect of society needs to change.

Upcoming Debate

If you’re on my blog I feel as though it’s probably safe to assume you at least kind of keep up with politics. That being said I’m sure most people in the US know of the upcoming debate between Bernie Sanders and Hilary Clinton. I mean, it’s all over and extremely hard to miss.

Why is this a big deal? Well. Hilary Clinton has basically been ignoring Bernie as her tactical approach. But now, she can no longer do that. Especially since he has been catching up fairly quickly in the polls.

And Clinton has refused to do any more debates other than the already scheduled six debates. Which of itself, is ridiculous. (Seriously?? Six??) Debates are what get candidates to really show their true colors and help all American people decide on who they want to support as their next president. With only six debates we don’t get any where near as much information on any of the candidates and therefore will be less informed of the honest intentions of each and every one of them.

Why is Hillary refusing to do more debates? Because it’s a win tactic my friend. She doesn’t want to do many debates for the same reason why the candidates that barely have any sort of recognition want debates. In case that didn’t clear it up, it’s because debates give a huge opportunity to either completely knock it out of the park and win many, many, many more votes, or, to completely blow most of your campaign just because of one slip up. The lesser known candidates get more publicity and even more votes are taken away from the already popular candidates. Hilary fears, and has every right to, that when she debates with Bernie she’ll lose even more votes, and maybe even the whole election. So she has decided to keep the debates to a minimum.

Bernie has basically said that he is willing to do as many debates as the people want, but, only if Hilary is in the debate as well. But the fact o the matter is, eight debates is freaking ridiculous. We the people will have severely limited knowledge on the democratic candidates this election compared to all other elections, and that is wrong.

Especially when you compare it to the 2008 elections, when President Obama was running against Hillary. Did you know there was a total of 25 unsanctioned debates? Blows your mind right? And now, Hillary is refusing to do more than the six sanctioned democratic debates. That’s just not right to me.

Sexual Assault

Did you know that there is about a one in six chance for a woman in America to be raped, and even more astounding, a one in four chance on college campuses? (Check it out for yourself right here.) I brought up Hillarys’ stance on sexual assault in an earlier post and I just want to come back to it now. Over 5% of women report experiencing rape in their college years, and that’s just the statistics of women who have come forward. There are many more who are embarrassed, or even discouraged off from going to authorities and reporting their sexual assault because of how it might “affect their future.” Will you believe me now when I say America has an extreme rape culture? The victim of rape always somehow gets the blame while their rapist goes free. And it’s truly sickening.

Rape culture is defined as ‘a term designed to show the ways in which society blamed victims of sexual assault and normalized male sexual violence.’  It was coined by feminists in the United States in the 1970’s, to help bring awareness to sexual assault incidents and encourage survivors to come forward. Another reason 90% sexual assault victims don’t come forward is because only about 25% of the perpetrators are actually caught, and even less are arrested.

Need a bit more clarification? Sexual Assault is an umbrella term that covers any unwanted sexual activity, whether it be something like kissing, groping, or worst of all, rape. Victims can also be coerced into sexual acts through verbal or non-verbal threats or through the use of substances, such as alcohol or drugs.

Many colleges and organizations to help sexual assault victims have started campaigns to gain awareness, such as the Rape Awareness and Prevention Campaign the Not Alone campaign (founded by my personal favorite, President Obama), and the Red Flag Campaign. These organizations were made to give support and offer advice for victims of sexual assault, and work towards preventing it not only on college campuses, but country wide.

Women take all sorts of measures in our society to prevent themselves from being sexually assaulted. Carrying pepper spray, always checking the backseat before getting into a car (truth be told, I mainly do that one because I’ve seen way too many horror movies), always having a buddy when going out, and the list goes on and on. The fact is that women need to protect themselves against rapists because we know if it were to happen, society would find a way to blame the raped, and not the rapist. Giving some sort of disgusting excuse of “she was asking for it”.

Did you know that rape is the only crime where saying the victim was asking for it is an actual excuse that holds up in court? Have you ever noticed that for any other type of case that would be considered a confession? Let that stew in your brain for a bit.

If you know of someone, or you yourself, have been a victim of sexual assault at any time in your life, please report the person if you can, and don’t be ashamed to come forward and say “this happened to me”. There are so many people and groups dedicated to helping those who have suffered, and we can’t change this aspect of sexual assault in society unless people start coming forward and fighting back. I understand that there are very many complicated scenarios out there where it is not possible for people to come forward, but we have to start somewhere. I also understand that some random teenager with a school blog asking you to upturn your life just for the sake of society is probably not very convincing, but please. At least reach out and get some help from somewhere. For your own mental health.

We, as in the American people, need a president that will take a stand against crazy things like this. It is terrifying to think that this kind of stuff is still occurring all over the country, hell, the whole world, in 2015. It is sick and something needs to be fixed.

Actual Feminism

It’s no secret that the word “feminism” has a bad reputation. But as many feminists know all too well, aversion to the term often is based on misunderstanding about what it actually means. (The problem really starts when people just straight up disagree with the actual meaning.) The correct definition of the word feminist is, according to the Merriam Webster Dictionary, “the advocacy of women’s rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.” Sounds simple, right? Then why is there so much opposition towards it?

I once knew someone whose health professor had been teaching that class for over 40 years, and in the late 70’s he’d told the story of how he had asked the class to raise their hand if they were a feminist. Every single person there, boys and girls, raised their hand. When he had asked the same question in my friends class, apparently only a few girls raised their hands while the rest didn’t move. When asked why they didn’t, they replied that while they believed men and women were equal, they thought calling themselves feminists was taking it too far.

The definition of feminist has not changed, the term has just been polluted and surrounded with so many misconceptions over the years. It’s actually simple. If you believe in the equality of the sexes and women’s rights then you can, and should, call yourself a feminist. How did it get polluted? Funny thing is, I learned just exactly how in my history class last year. Basically, when women wanted, and eventually won the right to vote, men got scared. Many cartoons came out about feminists, with the basic idea always being that the women will take over everything a man does, and then force the men to do ‘women’s work’. The funniest part about this to me, is that what scared the men was that they didn’t want to be treated like a woman was.

See?

For example,  popular Parks and Recreation actor and stand-up comedian Aziz Ansari spoke about being a feminist on the Late Show with David Letterman in February. Watch the video here.

“If you look up feminist in the dictionary, it just means someone who believes men and women have equal rights. And I think everyone here believes men and women have equal rights. But I think the reason people don’t clap is that the word is so weirdly used in our culture. Now, people think feminist means, like, some woman is gonna start yelling at them.” He added, “I feel like if you do believe that men and women have equal rights, if someone asks if you’re a feminist, you have to say yes, because that is how words work.”

Yes, it is truly that simple. So please educate the people around you about the true meaning of feminism, so we can help erase the misconceptions surrounding the word. Never be ashamed to call yourself a feminist!